When the deciding coin is tossed

The weekends were pretty much occupied with the june race going on. It sure feels different to be rowing in a team where everyone were not as enthusiastic and not possessing the fervour to achieve something. No doubt, trainings were not cramped almost everyday - we reap what we sow. Monday blues set in again because the weekends just had to swift past. Just yesterday, i was still with the boyfriend at the Times books warehouse sale, having a crab feast and playing mahjong with my dearest cousins & girlfriend. And just 2 days ago, i was happily prancing around, chatting with the girls (forgetting that i brought camera, so no pictures) and staying over at the boyfriend's. Now, all these had to disintegrate into thin air and sealed into my memory. We can't catch the past.

Well, it's time to start the engine rolling by training hard for the nus run relay and the safra bay 10km run. Nevertheless, i've got some good reads to put away random thoughts for the time being.

Tasteful to my liking

For the past days, i've been browsing through the job portals searching for a job. It's always the sending of resumes and entering of particulars, how boring can that get. I went for 3 interviews yesterday and rejected a job which requires me to make direct marketing by walking door to door as a marketing trainee. However, despite the usual tensed interviews, 2 of them sparked off conversation with me when they learnt i was from dragonboat beacuse they were ex-rowers too- how interesting. I learnt that so many admin jobs in the market are up for grabs but data entry is so not my kind of thing because it's extremely monotonous and so i rejected one although it fetches a good pay. I'm still waiting for good news for the events job but i have a hunch i wouldnt make the cut for it.

Meanwhile i'm contented with what i am doing now becasue those primary school kids are so innocently cute - at times. I would not want to be locked in a cage. I want to fly high. I'm in need of a good read to fill my palette with more colors. Any recommendations?

The boyfriend took leave on monday, we trained in school, collected our 3 years hard earned paper, made him a pair of new glasses, lunched at chinatown and caught 'Don't mess with the Zohan' at PS.

Inconsiderate act caught on cell;

I am not the girlfriend

I am seeking seclusion in my comfort zone, away from those despicable happenings. I've made up my mind to sit here and wait, even if it means getting my ass sore. In such times, there are some things we do to convince ourselves that it is a better way out. It is far easier than telling ourselves the truth. Affairs of the heart is too much of a profound insight for me to fathom - i don't wish to, either. Being in and out of love is part of growing up. Losing someone dear may end up in an emotional wreckage, then again, it is the process. I want to detach myself from all these and be at my liberty to fly. Maybe to me, eluding is always the best option because there is simply nothing to work it out. There is.

When it comes to keeping my emotions a discrete, im not a professional because im always exploited. I hold on to my values and expectations but hey, not everyone is perfect. Even the perfectionist is not entirely so. Our feelings are manipulative and words shoot through the heart so fast that it bleeds. "I'm sorry" - too much overtime would turn into numbness. Everything should just come to a halt.

NYDC at heeren;

Making the efforts

Sometimes we'd get caught in the midst of thinking - even the slightest thing that exists. In the whirlwind of events and people around you, it is often hard and tiring to think and decide. At some moments, you can actually feel the squeeze on your brain muscles. Even when we're sleeping, our brains are constantly functioning. So i'd guess the time when we'll finally stop thinking is when we are dead. This explains why some people are mentally tired and it certainly takes a longer time to heal than the physical. Maybe most poeple are simply lazy to think so they'd always follow the crowd and being led by the nose without even realising. I have my moments too but i hope not to that extreme.

A sky of hope

A ripple of wind ran through the long grass at the edge of the field beyond the hedge, and ruffled the leaves. It blew Jackie's scarf across her face and she wriggled to be let out of the pushchair. I undid the strap and she struggled free, then feeling playful after being held down for so long, she started to run round, peeping out at me from behind the grave stones, clambering onto chunks of granite and sliding clumsily off them again, pointing and laughing at marble angels.

'No Jackie,' I started to say, 'not here.' It seemed disrespectful to the dead somehow, to use the graveyard as a playground. But then I thought of Ben in my dream, swimming free and happy, strong and supple away into the middle of the lake, and I let her play. Ben wouldn't have minded, I was quite sure of that. He'd have tried to folloe her, getting his dungarees muddy and laughing everytime she whisked her sweet little face around to wave at him.

The week was filled with much merry making. No doubt, trainings brighten up my life despite the tiredness - the adrenaline rush. However, i am partially skeptical in participating the 21k run because Zak & i have not been running much to clock the distance. I am contemplating despite Zak's adamant insistence to it. Yes, i am not an ardent runner.

Wednesday at pasta mania;

Thursday at crystal jade hongkong cafe;

J.Co;

Pizzahut;

Sugar, sweets and everything nice

Kids nowadays are living in their comfy and liberated zones - owing to their well-educated and high paying parents. Most of them - primary school kids, will be equipped with the latest technology; camera phone, mp3 or even a PSP. During my time, we'd just be bothered to play hop scotch and five stones, few even knew what was handphone all about. With more liberation in school rules lately, kids are allow to bring their mobile and parents will then be able to contact their precious ones. During mine, there would always be routine checks for handphones - ready to be confiscated and redeemed by parents. On the hind side, some parents may not be as well-to-do but they struggled real hard to give the best to their child. Social patterns of people are drastically shedding its old skin to welcome the new era. Is it for the better or worst? I can only say they are too much pampered.

Friday was intended for catching a movie because i thought i could buy the tickets off the net with ibanking but somehow the GV system was not working and i could not check the ibanking box. After almost an hour trying to reach GV for help, i gave up - the line is forever engaged. Headed down to Marina to meet my mum & aunt for dinner, chilled for a shortwhile at Coffee Club; ice mocha vanilla, ice earl vanilla and mud pie. Dinner was steamboat buffet at Suntec - it was unworthy of the value.

His fave mudpie;

Sunday at Mushroom Hotpot Buffet for dinner - Stadium Waterfront, with the regulars after my rowing.